This passage is my observation of how Hindus have become “Reformists” without realizing the final result of such reformation. It is an ongoing process over which we now have no control because now we are exposed to so much more that it has become even more difficult to train our mind to hold on to the important and give up the temptation to pay attention to the trivial. There was a time in our culture when material possessions were given least importance and the entire race believed in the value of the journey towards discovering the Self or the Atma and training it to merge with the Paramatma. Our Vedantas, our Upanishads, our Bhagwad Gita, all exhorted us to value this search and this destination. We are the only civilization where we identify ourselves as the descendants of Rishis – those Rishis who did not have a single material possession to call their own, those Rishis who’s students went around asking for Bhiksha once a day from householders, those Rishis who never wore anything more than the bare minimum and who never even left behind any property for their own children. Today, we are trying our level best to leave behind enough wealth for atleast 3 generations and hence indulge in all sorts of earnings and hoarding.

Let’s take a look at the parents of the 60s and 70s…

                People who had become parents in the 60s and the 70s were beset with becoming Modern, learning English and getting Government jobs. They put their children in English Medium Convent schools and pushed them to get good marks and get admission into the best colleges, IITs and IIMs and then dream of settling abroad. For the first time in many years, girls too ventured out into the big bad world on their own. Wearing western attires became the rage and men stopped wearing dhotis and pyjamas except at home or during a Puja or a Temple visit. Women too started wearing pants, dresses and salwar kameezes, slowly abandoning the saris. Casteism was portrayed as the big evil thing which could be done away with inter-caste love marriages and this started picking up in the cities. Holidays meant villages and pilgrimages.

                By the time these children had grown up and settled, parents realized that these children were missing during family functions, illnesses and even deaths.

Parents of the 80s and 90s …

                They had some idea of their culture and traditions but did not know how to do any ritual completely. Children now study only in English Medium schools … parents opt for CBSE or ICSE instead of State boards. Since most of the families were double income families ie. Both spouses went to work, children missed having a parent around while growing up. The result was that most children, especially in cities, were cut off from their roots completely. Going abroad for further studies and living there was taken for granted. There was no Bharat – only India existed and that too they were ashamed of the backwardness in our “mentality”. Religious differences were the big evil thing and this could be done away with by having inter-religious marriages. Women who were not working were considered as a burden on the poor husband who had to work single handedly to run the family and “educated” children too looked down on them. Families in which women were not allowed to work were considered “regressive”. Men now wore jeans and T-shirts as informal clothes and Western formals to office and weddings. Women had almost rejected the saris and Western formals were the acceptable clothes at the workplace. Women wore maxis/nighties at home and salwar-kameezes for functions and Temple visits. Temple visits no longer meant wearing dhotis for boys/men or saris/ghagra choli, etc for girls/women. In fact, Temple visits, having Pujas at home reduced to almost nothing and celebrating festivals were shameful because of noise pollution, water pollution and other issues. Festivals when celebrated were reduced to buying more and more stuff and Christmas was a favourite. Holidays meant villages and tourist spots.

Parents in the 90s and 2000s …

No concept of Hindu culture at home, humanity was the major religion. Spirituality was to be aspired for instead of being a practicing Hindu. The biggest festivals were Valentine’s day, Christmas and Diwali (without crackers of course). Schools meant ICSE board or International Boards like IGCSE or IB. Pujas if they had to be held at home, had to have caterers, Pundits (not necessarily Brahmins or men) with their assistants and some decorations professionally done. Pujas were more about singing bhajans and less about Ved-pathan or Sanskrit. Parents stayed out late at work or recreation and children stayed out late with friends – only the servants stayed at home the whole day. There were servants for every work to be done at home – from cleaning to stitching to cooking and looking after in-laws, if they were staying in the same house. Children studied at school and at tuitions. Parents hardly “taught” their children and mostly blamed the children, the education system, the teachers, the peer pressure and almost everyone but themselves for the way their children turned out. Parents themselves were deracinated and further deracinated their children. Hardly any parents spoke at home in their mother-tongue and children did not do it either. Many languages were on the verge of getting extinct. It was now a global culture that was to be looked up to. India was believed to be in the pits, full of corruption and had hardly any government jobs. Jobs in private sector paid well but there was no sense of personal time or space. Holidays meant going abroad and touring the world without having gone to any place of importance in Bharat.

Parents in 2010 & 2020s …

                Damn, we are proud Hindus. But we do not know about any Hindu ritual, scripture, Puja or Festival. We have never visited any Teerth-kshetras or gone on any pilgrimage but realize that we have some of the best architecture in the world. We are ashamed of our education system, our caste system, our government, our deracinated parents, our TV shows, everything for not having taught us about Hinduism and take baby steps to learn about Hinduism via SM and some Hindu portals. We realize now that inter-religious marriages are no longer happy and are an excuse to inviting Love-jihad. We still walk around saying “Be human, that is the best religion” but realize in our hearts that only the Hindu is saying this honestly. The others are just mouthing this before indulging in Jihad and Conversions. We are now fighting to celebrate Diwali with crackers, Holi with water and Ganesh Chaturti/Dussera in Pandals but know that it is no longer the same as it was before. Children are more interested in Western festivals which have no connection to our culture and we are clueless as to how to make them interested in our festivals. We are so tired from our jobs and children too are so stuck to phones and devices that it is an effort to be a family. Guests do not drop in uninvited at all and children do not know their cousins at all. Holidays are enjoyed separately and not as a family because everyone wants more space. When parents die, even final rites are debated between useful and useless and time consuming. We are the CONFUSED HINDUS and don’t know whether caste is good or bad, Temples should be free or under Government control, Sanskrit should be popularized or not, education should be in the mother-tongue or English, take citizenship abroad or stay back in Bharat … the list is endless.

Did Hindus reform themselves after Independence or did Hindus lose themselves after 1947? Has reform, modernization, westernization, Vasudhaiva-Kutumbakam, help us in any way or has all this only made us lose that which we held on to thousands of years – our Civilisational Identity and Pride? Do ponder over this…

Note: The above points are not necessarily true for everyone. Please excuse the grammar mistakes. Image taken randomly from the Internet.

DISCLAIMER: The author is solely responsible for the views expressed in this article. The author carries the responsibility for citing and/or licensing of images utilized within the text.